Confusion and despair set in. It's only been a day, but now everyone has lots of advice. The doctor tries to press you into action, your friends and family give you lots of advice (even if it's only "do what the doctor tells you"). Even the nurses have advice.

Nurses are the power behind the medical community's throne, and if you have a problem it's most likely a nurse who will help you. Nurses know the system, and they can guide you through it. Pay attention.

While Jackie was still in the hospital, a number of nurses suggested that we find another surgeon, and they had a specific recommendation. To figure out if we should switch, we asked for a second opinion from the suggested doctor. He was blunt. He told us cancer at 33 was bad news. He said if it was his wife, he'd throw everything he could at it. He suggested surgery, radiation, and chemotherapy. We were impressed by this doctor -- he made sense.

We decided to follow his advice, and to plan for all of the treatments that he suggested. It was nice to see a view that was not restricted to the specialty of the doctor we happened to be talking to at the time. Of course, Jackie's original surgeon was quite put out. It's a lot easier to change gas stations than doctors, but you can't let a doctor's anger or histrionics change your decision. Emotions can and do help in the battle against cancer, but emotional decisions do not.